[ anywhere, kaveh had said. anywhere that it is only us.
the truth of the matter is that he never hates being seen with alhaitham. they are, impossibly so, friends. they are what each other has left. to hate being seen alongside another person is to insult their person, to claim unspoken embarrassment not for being seen, but for being with them. none of those are true. that he would ever be seen with alhaitham is as logical as claiming the sun and the moon cohabit the same sky.
what kaveh hates is himself. it is being known for something he has not asked for. it is attributing his identity to something out of his grasp. something he was never given a chance to control.
yes, he thinks. it's far easier to live if kaveh forgets himself in his entirety.
his fingers twitch under the lotus. it is subtle, but it is telling. ]
no subject
[ anywhere, kaveh had said. anywhere that it is only us.
the truth of the matter is that he never hates being seen with alhaitham. they are, impossibly so, friends. they are what each other has left. to hate being seen alongside another person is to insult their person, to claim unspoken embarrassment not for being seen, but for being with them. none of those are true. that he would ever be seen with alhaitham is as logical as claiming the sun and the moon cohabit the same sky.
what kaveh hates is himself. it is being known for something he has not asked for. it is attributing his identity to something out of his grasp. something he was never given a chance to control.
yes, he thinks. it's far easier to live if kaveh forgets himself in his entirety.
his fingers twitch under the lotus. it is subtle, but it is telling. ]
What do you think I should have done, then?